BOOM!

The sound of an exploding building shakes the ground, temporarily blocking out the sounds of the wounded, orders yelled by officers, and the scream of Sith and Republic fighters overhead.

A teenage boy flinches, cringing away from the sound as it buffets his ears, robe flapping in the ash-filled wind.  He glances over at the source, just in time to see a skyscraper collapse, flinging duracrete and dust in all directions.  His green eyes darken as he feels the deaths through the Force, like a physical blow.

“Master!” He yells, voice tinged with fear and desperation.

“Calm yourself, Saelus.  Do not let your fear take control.”  A calm voice cuts through the cacophony of sounds as the dust clears a bit, revealing a figure on top of a pile of rubble.  Master Blith stands stiff upon the duracrete pile, face a mask of calm determination as the fires nearby illuminate it.  He turns to look at Saelus, brown eyes like black coal in the darkness of the ash filled sky.  

“But the spaceport-” Saelus begins before being cut off.  ”Stop that right now, Padawan.  You are letting your fear, the recent deaths, take control of you.  You have to release these feelings into the Force.”  Master Blith says, voice stern.

Saelus trembles but nods, taking in a deep breath as he tries to center himself, reaching out to the Force.  He blocks out the sounds around him, focusing on his breathing, his heartbeat, the flow of the Force even among the chaos.  Slowly, he calm down, terror dropped away to be replaced with the calm only granted from the Force.

He opens his eyes, nodding at his Master.  ”I’m calm, Master.  What do we do?”

Master Blith smiles grimly, turning his gaze back to the oncoming Sith Force.  ”We fight, Padawan.  We do our duty to the Republic and it’s citizens.  We go to War.”

Now that I’m slowly getting back into the swing of things in regards to Saelus, I’ve begun working on three different memories from his past.  So far one is near completion  one has the barebones, and the third is merely a scene in my head.  I’m hoping to post them within the span of two weeks and still be happy with how they turn out.

Here are the memories:

1. Saelus and Master Jost Blith become trapped on a planet as the Sith Empire descends to conquer it.  This is Saelus’s first time being in an active warzone.  He’s not been a Padawan for very long at this point

2. Saelus leads a charge with Republic Troopers against an entrenched Imperial position.  This is Saelus’s first experience in all out warfare while being on his own. He’s been a Padawan for years at this point and has typically been by Master Blith’s side.

3.  Saelus is dragged to a Coruscanti Ball by his Master.  This is when he first met a Jedi Woman whom he later learned was his Masters lover.  It’s also his first interaction with members of the opposite sex in an intimate manner. (Nothing sexual)

Please, gather round, gather round.  Get comfortable now, this will be a long story.

Much better…… Now, as with most elderly, I’m content and fufilled with my life.  Except for in one aspect.  Every old man deserves to have his stories heard.  The stories involving his adventures, conquests, loves, gains, losses, and accomplishments.  Most choose specific stories at specifics points in there lives.  Of course, most did not lead the life I have.

My story spans decades, encompassing thousands of individuals, dozens of planets and solar systems, and a war bloodier then any other before it.  I speak of my life as a Jedi Knight.

It truly began when I was twenty-seven galactic years of age, nearing my twenty-eight name day.  For four months I had been recovering from an…. Ordeal that had pushed me past my limits.  It left scars, physical and mental, that had only just begun to heal.  The Jed Council had decided that I needed someone to ground me, keep my mind from wandering to dark places.  They wanted me to take on a Padawan. 

Of course I resisted.  I did my best to explain I was far too busy and did not have enough experience to properly train anyone.  It did nothing to sway them.  I was invited to return to Tython, to watch a lightsaber tourney and judge.  

So I went.  And that is what changed my life forever.

So I have an update regarding Saelus and his story.  It’s being rewritten…… From scratch.  It will be moving in a slightly different direction that is a bit darker then before.  The only posts that are now ICly accurate are those regarding his past (Birth till 10 years after the Treaty of Coruscant) and the modified version of his capture and torture.

Silence.

Utter Darkness.

I feel nothing.  Hear nothing.  See nothing.  I am nothing.

Trapped within myself, either by choice or through the Force I do not know.  All I know is pain.

So much of it.  The burning of fire, the ache of Force lightning, the cutting of vibroblades, the bitterness of poison.  Familiar now.  Too familiar.

I force myself out of my haven, back into consciousness.  I groan……. The pain is nearly unbearable.  I can feel the cuts weeping my life’s blood, the poison burning through my veins with each pump of my heart.  The skin of my back cracks as I shift, causing me to bite my tongue in agony.  It’s bad.  Blackened and crusty.  I can feel the taint of the Dark Side, the ache in my entire body.  Force Lightning always felt the worst.  Especially when He was in a dark mood.

I retreat back into my mind, back into the safety of darkness and silence.  I failed myself…. I failed the council.  I had not found what they had sent me to discover.  Instead I had let my guard down, believing that the Sith would not dare break the Treaty of Coruscant.

I jerk back into my body just as the first wave comes, forcing a hoarse scream of torment from my throat.  My body convulses as He laughs, the smell of burning skin permeating the air as the lightning arcs across it.  

He stops, my body still shaking with aftershocks.  ”I so do enjoy our time together, Saelus.  But I also tire of this game.  Give in already.  Beg for your life and ask me for a quick death.  Do that and you will be set free.”  I can smell His rancid breath as he kneels down in front of me.  He jerks my head up with a jerk, causing the chains holding up my limp body to jingle.  I grimace at the pain, keeping my eyes shut.  

“Beg….. Beg!”

His words wash over me…. Laden with the Dark Side of the Force.

No.  My eyes open, taking in his disfigured face.  The sickly yellow of His eyes, the corrupted skin, and the blackened teeth.  He pulls back a bit in surprise as I lean forward, ignoring the torrents of pain that rush though me.  ”There is no emotion, there is peace…..”  I force the words from my ruined throat, taking some small satisfaction at the look of pure hatred on his face as he pulls away.

I retreat into my own mind as the torture resumes, allowing the solace of darkness and silence to wash over me.  I would escape.  Or I would die.  Somehow, I would escape this imprisonment as long as I trusted in the Force.  As long as the Force was with me, I would succeed.

((I’m going to be posting small excerpts from important events in Saelus’s events.  These excerpts will be in the book I’m attempting to write on Saelus leading up to the present timeline.  Thanks to Lowercasejae for helping edit and put a fine touch on it!))

I guess now is the time they decide, I thought, eyes drifting from one Master to the next. The council chambers were bare as always; the chairs for each of the Masters being the only thing to adorn them. Master Blith sat in a hover chair next to me, still recovering from the betrayal.

We both are in a way, I thought. Him from heartbreak, and me… just plain betrayal.

“We have come to a decision regarding recent events,” Grand Master Satele Shan said, face troubled. “Master Blith, due to your injuries, we have decided you would best serve the Order here on Tython, teaching the younglings. Your experience is undeniable and will be a welcome addition, I’m sure.” Master Shan held Master Blith’s grief-plagued visage for a moment, as if silently saying she knew of exactly what had happened rather than the partial truth we told.

I felt my heartbeat pick up as she turned her gaze to me, feeling as if my soul were laid bare.  I had never been able to be fully comfortable around her in my 23 years at the Temple; this was no different.

“Padawan Saelus… Your situation is a troubling one. You have proven yourself a very capable leader and fighter at the Battles of Rhem Var and Balmorra.  You have seen much of war and death, most of which I wish you hadn’t. We have decided to give you the option to leave the Order.” Master Shan’s voice was quiet.  Sad.

Leave the Order?  I mused.  I would never have to be betrayed again. I could live in peace: no war, no responsibilities other than for myself. I could be free of the weight. But…

The girl’s face as she died on Rhem Var.  The heroic men and women of the Republic Army. The people left behind on Balmorra.  Is it really right of me to leave now, when I am needed most…?

No.

I could feel myself straighten to my full height, losing the slight hunch I had acquired. I looked around the room once more, locking my gaze upon each Master before meeting Master Shan’s eyes. No longer did I feel uncomfortable or unsure. I felt…  alive.

“For people to be free, some must bear the burden of protectors. As Jedi, it is our duty to do so. I will not stand by and allow innocents to suffer because I fear carrying that weight.  We stand firm against the darkness that would sweep through the galaxy to enslave, murder, destroy, and crush everyone and everything.”  I took a breath.  “I refuse to give in for even one step, one centimeter. Because I am a Jedi: a Protector, a Light in the Darkness. And I will die being so.”  I felt calm, collected, and strong, for the first time since Rhem Var. The burden was still there, but no longer was it taken on by a sense of duty. Now it was taken willingly.

 Master Shan slowly smiled at me, nodding.  She turned to look at the other Masters, asking silently. Each one gave a nod in turn; even Master Blith had a small smile on his face, the first in weeks.

“The betrayal of a close friend hurt you deeply, Saelus.  But you overcame it; you didn’t let it control you. You lost nearly everything, but you didn’t back down. You passed the Trial of Flesh.” Slowly, she walked toward me.

I’m taking my trials!? They’ve decided I’m ready to try and become a Jedi Knight!?

“Your prowess at the Battle of Rhem Var showed you have the skill. You passed the Trial of Skill. Your willingness to fight at the Battle of Balmorra, knowing it was likely a death sentence, showed you have courage. You passed your Trial of Courage. Seeing past your friendship to the betrayal at hand showed you can look past what is shown to the truth. You passed your Trial of Insight.” Master Shan stopped in front of me, unclipping her lightsaber from her belt.

“Deciding to stay with the Order, to take on the burden of Protector no matter the cost to yourself, showed us what we needed to know. You have passed the Trial of Spirit.  Kneel, Padawan Saelus.” She ordered, igniting her saber.

I kneeled, trying to process what was going on.

I passed my Trials without even knowing? Am I ready to be a Jedi Knight?

I gazed up at her, unsure of myself or what to do. I could feel the heat of her lightsaber as it rested mere inches above my right shoulder, moving over my head to my left shoulder. Master Shan looked down at me, shifting her hand to cut my Padawan braid.

“You came into this chamber a Padawan of the Jedi Order.  Rise now as a Jedi Knight, Protector of the Order and the Republic.”  She proclaimed, deactivating her lightsaber and gesturing for me to rise. I got to my feet in a daze, mind processing what had just occurred.

“You are dismissed, Knight Saelus. We will call upon you soon enough.” All I could do was instinctively bow before walking out of the chambers.

I was a Jedi Knight.

+++Datachip Inserted+++

++No entries detected++

++Preparing Recording++

+Begin Recording+

-Recording begins with a man looking to be in his mid to late twenties sitting in a chair.  Behind him are two wartorn banners along with what seems to be a ships hull. A low humming like the sound of ship engines can be heard in the background.  The mans green eyes seem slightly sad, brown hair short and slightly messy.  His skin seems slightly tan, as if he’s been in the sun for a few days. He’s wearing a plain brown robe-

Hello.

-He speaks with a slight Russian accent-

My name is Saelus Flynn, Jedi Knight and Guardian.  This is my first entry in what my old Master has recommended I do in order to help expel my feelings and thoughts.  

-Saelus frowns, one hand reaching up to tap his chin in thought-

Master Blith has never been wrong before so I see no reason not to do this.  He recommended I make one whenever I am unable to expel my emotions in meditation or something important happens.  Which is both in this case.  

-Saelus sighs, looking down for a moment-

I met a young boy today.  Pasha O’toole.  Orphan it seems, genius at tech though.  Caught him making off with a -lot- of credits.  At first I was just going to turn him in….. But something told me not to.  A feeling.  And Master Blith taught me to always trust my instincts.  So instead I brought him back to my ship, asked him a few questions.  

-Saelus smiles, eyes twinkling-

Turns out he steals from people who watch holoporn.  Pasha honestly thinks that as long as he steals from people like that, it’s ok.  Understandable but still wrong.  So I offered him a job.  I’ve had times where I needed a slicer so I think it’s productive for both of us.  He gets good pay, food, and housing.  He was so excited to have his own room.

-Saelus chuckles, reaching up to run a hand through his hair- 

He’s a good kid.  Though he lacks respect, is rebellious, and very very stubborn.  Kind of nice actually though a pain.

-Saelus holds up a lightsaber, frowning-

Discovered a strange crystal on Taris.  Seems to have originally been green before a Rakghoul bled all over it.  The plaque……… It seems to have mutated it.  

-Saelus activates the lightsaber, a black blade with a green trim erupting from it-

It…. Feels alive in a sense.  Not sentient, but still alive.  I’ve never seen a crystal like it before.  

-Saelus sighs, deactivating the lightsaber.  He swivels in the chair facing the banners-

Pasha asked about those.  About why I still had ratty banners.  I don’t think he’ll ever understand.  I -hope- he never understands.  They’re from the Battles of Rhen Var and Balmorra respectively.  They remind me.  Remind me of what the Empire will do to win.  Remind me of how much the Republic has sacrificed.  Remind me that every man that fights is a hero.  

-Saelus turns back to the holocam, face haunted-

For some reason the nightmares are back.  Nearly all of them are about Balmorra.  I think it’s an omen.  A message from the Force.  I need to face my demons before they consume me.  Before they cause me to Fall.

-Saelus rubs his face, voice muffled by his hand-

I’ve decided to take on a Padawan.  I’ll begin visiting Tython more often, hope I find a connection with one of them.  Time will tell.

+Recording ends+

Name: Saelus Flynn

Age: 28

Race: Human

Height: 6’3

Eye Color: Light Green

Hair Color: Brown

Occupation: Jedi Knight

Alignment: Light

Rank: Jedi Knight

Old Master: Jost Blith

Abilities/Training:

• Force Push (Expert)
• Force Stasis (Expert)
• Master of Soresu Form
• Basic and Advanced Jedi Training
• Expert in Shien Form
• Journeyman in Ataru, Shii-Cho, and Makashi Forms
• Basic and Advanced Diplomacy training

Accolades/Career History

• Won Lightsaber tourney 2 years in a row at the age of 15 and 16
• Acknowledged to have been at the forefront of the fighting at the Battle of Rhen Var.
• Was acknowledged to have been pinnacle, along with his Master, in holding a besieged line during the Battle of Balmorra.
• Attainted Knighthood at the age of 26

Personality:

Calm and collected. Remains in control of his emotions during most situations.  Staunch follower of Jedi Code at most times.  Questions certain aspects based from personal experience.  Trust problems stemming from past events.  Is prone to bouts of depression and anxiety from past memories.

History:

Born on Coruscant, Saelus was discovered by the Jedi at the age of 4.  During his time there, he began to see how much of a toll the Great Galactic War was taking on the Jedi Order.  He began to get close to a Jedi Knight by the name of Jost Blith.  By the time he was 11, Jost had attained the rank of Master.  

Master Jost Blith took Saelus on as a Padawan on his 12th birthday, surprising both Saelus and the council.  At this time, Saelus began to focus entirely on his lightsaber training, determined to at least be worthy of the rank of Jedi Battlemaster if not attain it.  During his Apprenticeship, he served with his Master on the frontline of multiple battles during the Great Galactic War.  Notably at the Battles of Rhen Var and Balmorra.  While he outwardly accepted the Treaty of Coruscant, he privately grieved for those slaughtered at the Jedi Temple and yearned to bring the Empire to it’s knees.

The years following the Treaty of Coruscant were filled with meditation, secret skirmishes, and a continuous drive to be the best he could be.  9 ATC marked Saelus’s advancement to Knighthood.  His trials tested not only his determination, but his loyalty, inner peace, skills, and life.  Thought he initially stumbled, Saelus stood firm, even against the onslaught of a Sith Lord.  Though he came out alive, he also came out changed.  Having to kill his Masters oldest friend changed Saelus, forcing him to rethink his views on the war against the Empire.

Since attaining his Knighthood, Saelus has worked diligently to keep the Republic and the innocents of the Galaxy safe from the Sith Empire.  As expected, he acquired powerful enemies along the way, culminating in his capture one year to the day after his Knighting.  Held for four months, he eventually escaped in the confusion following a Republic Commando attack on the facility.  

Though Saelus has not talked about what he endured under Sith imprisonment, medical records indicate severe trauma to his body from sharp objects being used all the way to burning by fire.  Records also contain a footnote of recommendation for Saelus to attend therapy for possible Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. 

((A big thanks to Skyrook for giving me the idea on how to format this))